Key to Success: Enlivened Speaking

Recently, I met Miroslav Petrovic, a TEDx speaker, author, and event facilitator who specialises in the power of speaking and how we can make an impactful connection with both ourselves and others through sharing our voice.

I attended his one-day event, ‘IGNITED: Unleash Your Speaker Power’ and learnt a lot about different techniques, and most especially what speaking means to him and myself. In a draw, I won his three-day event, ‘Fully Alive’ and made so many connections with various people who are sharing or who hope to share their message with the world. I was able to experience speaking as not just memorising a script and sharing words on a piece of paper, but having the courage to step out of my comfort zone and share who I am.

Miroslav’s work isn’t just typical things like simply speaking clearly or body language like moving your hands and walking around, but rather allowing people to feel your presence, your connection to them, and the impact that you are able to make on people who need to hear what you are sharing. It was a profound spiritual experience that touches on the things that are limiting you from sharing your story, your message, and the person that you are.

I would highly recommend his many programs if you feel like you have something to share, but you don’t feel ready. This article contains some quotes that I noted from the one-day, ‘IGNITED’ event and the techniques I learnt from meeting him and his work. You can read more about him at www.miroslavp.com or via his Instagram handle: @themiroslavexperience. You can also check out the Enlivened Speaking Institute which he founded at: www.enlivenedspeakinginstitute.com.

The Courage to Be Authentic

“If you’re not happy with your life, it’s probably because you’re not speaking or being authentic to yourself.” – Miroslav Petrovic

How many times have you said yes to something when you really wanted to say no? How many times have you agreed with someone just to please them when you knew it wasn’t right? How many times did you really want to say something, but the fear of failure and judgement stopped you?

Speaking is what turns our thoughts into communication and what we as human beings use to express ourselves. Many of us have experienced countless times in our lives when we were afraid of standing up for ourselves, others, and what we believe in. For many of us, deep down, we know what it is that we truly want, yet we don’t have the courage to express it. Many of us have been shut down by others, our thoughts and feelings deemed invalid, and our voices silenced.

I want you to know first and foremost, your voice should be heard, your opinions, thoughts, and beliefs are valid, and the only one truly limiting you from your freedom to speak is yourself. Ask yourself, “What is stopping me from speaking my truth? What desires am I not acknowledging and pursuing?”

Authenticity

“Not about what you know, but who you are.” – Dr Parker Palmer

Sometimes when we want to share our stories, we have thoughts like, “What do I know? I don’t have the credentials to speak about this. Why would anyone listen to me?” I want to share with you something that Angelica Alen told me. Angelica is a Health and Life Coach helping people to change their lives by changing their physical, mental, and emotional habits. Angelica was diagnosed with Stage 3B Bowel Cancer in 2018 and after conquering cancer through changing her own habits, she started helping others do the same.

You can find out more about Angelica at: https://angelicaalen.com

She told me this: “Do you think an Oncologist or someone who has actually lived through cancer and several chemo sessions would be able to better support someone with cancer?

I said to her, “Well, an Oncologist is certified and would know more since it’s their job, but someone who has survived cancer would be able to fully understand what it’s like and be able to relate more to someone currently going through it.”

She replied, “That’s right, most of the time, a doctor wouldn’t have gone through 12 chemo sessions like I did. My experience helps support people because it was a reality for me, I went through it, and I’ve come out the other side.”

For a lot of people, the message they want to share is something that affected them personally. You may not have gone through several years of schooling, but you have something far more valuable, experience. People need to hear your story because they need hope, a reminder that it’s a reality for others too, and there are people who got through it. That’s how you build a powerful connection with your audience.

Presence and Connection

“When you’re speaking, it’s your room.” – Miroslav Petrovic

You’ve shown up as your authentic self and you’ve got a message to share, now let’s talk about some key tips for when you’re on the stage. To make an impact, you need to build connection, and to build a connection, you need to establish your presence. One of the main ways speakers do this is by non-verbal communication. Some people may think of non-verbal communication as moving their hands, walking around, and basically anything that isn’t speaking, hence the name, but it’s much more than that.

Here’s a little activity you can try. Gather some people, family, friends, anyone, and get them to sit down as you stand in front of them. Stand right up close, make eye contact, and take a deep breath. Notice how the room feels, how you feel, and their reactions. Pretty intense, right?

Great, simply by standing there doing nothing you’ve established your presence. And if you felt that tension, you could feel that you had a pretty big presence even if you weren’t actually doing or saying anything, right?

Sometimes when speakers get up on stage and start speaking right away, if you’re not extremely interested in what they’re saying, you’re probably going to get bored. You have to actually connect with your audience by making your presence known. This can be done by simply standing up there and taking a deep breath. Don’t speak at your audience, speak to them. You’re not just speaking about your topic; you’re speaking to real people who want to be able to understand and benefit from your work. Acknowledge their presence and let them acknowledge yours.

Framing

“Your capacity to have range is your capacity to have influence.” – Miroslav Petrovic

Alright, you’re being authentic, and you’ve established your presence, now it’s time to actually speak. No offense, but if you’re not speaking to people who are already interested in you and your topic, they are probably going to fall asleep. Not everyone is going to be as passionate as you are, so you have to show them how this is relevant, beneficial, or interesting.

Let me give you an example. You’re a scientist and you’re doing a presentation on your findings. If you’re speaking to a room full of scientists, you can use all those fancy, scientific words, and explain it exactly how it is because they know what you’re talking about. If you’re speaking to the general public, who aren’t aware of the words or concepts you’re explaining, your presentation is not going to be relevant to them, and they will just end up really confused. You have to frame your speech differently in a way that they can understand and be interested in.

Here’s how you can do this:

Step 1: State their box.

What I mean by box is their current perception, beliefs, or the limited knowledge they have been conditioned to.

This could be framed as:

Some of you may think/know…

Step 2: Introduce a new frame.

Now introduce what you’re here to discuss.

This could be framed as:

I invite you to consider…

What if…

When you start framing and phrasing your speech in ways that build the tension, get the audience excited, and make it easier for them to understand, your audience will be 100x more engaged and will have likely benefitted from your work in the way you intended.

How to really be a good speaker

These are some useful tips to help you on your speaking journey, but what’s the real secret to becoming a good speaker?

Experience. It’s as simple as that. Speaking is a physical activity. Like sports, knowing all the rules, tips, and tricks is extremely different to experiencing the real thing.

Speaking is scary for a lot of people so know that you’re not alone, but great speakers are not born, they are made. You need to step out of your comfort zone in order to grow. The only thing that’s going to truly calm your nerves in the long term is getting used to it, and I promise soon, it will get easier. Even if its speaking in front of your friends and family, get used to putting yourself on the spot. When you’re ready to speak in front of others, there are many ways you can do this, such as public stages. There are many public stages that you probably don’t know about. Open mic nights like comedy and storytelling, events like expos where you can book yourself to speak, or workshops and trainings like Miroslav’s that allow you to develop your speaking skills in a safe environment where you won’t be judged. Eventually, you can even make money as a keynote speaker, for example.

People value your experience and your message and are willing to pay for it. If people aren’t valuing your message, you’re probably not speaking to the right audience. I promise you there are people out there who need to hear your message, but you need to step out of your comfort zone in order to reach them. You are so valid, give yourself the chance to let others and you see that.

Disclaimer: This work was 100% inspired by Miroslav Petrovic including the tips that I explain. His work including, events, trainings, and his book, explain in further detail the concepts mentioned here and many more. I highly recommend attending his one-day event held in Brisbane, Gold Coast, Melbourne, and potentially more locations in the near future to get a taste of his work and the support he can give you on your speaking journey. Please refer to the above links.

Thank you, Miroslav and Angelica, for your contribution to this article and the great support and advice you have given me.